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Blunt Instrument - by John Birmingham

Why I deleted my Facebook and Twitter apps

Life without social media apps has its benefits.

So, I deleted all the social media apps from my phone. I think my life is better without them. Before you protest, "But JB, I just saw that photograph of a black cat dressed as Darth Vader that you shared," I didn't delete my accounts. Just the apps on my phone and, for good measure, my iPad. Having done so, I feel a lot less stressed and I'd like to talk to you about why.

I, for one, do not welcome our new arachnid overlords

There are more than 1200 species of the huntsman spider.

A new poll has discovered that 49 per cent of sensible adults who answer my polls on Twitter think huntsman spiders will definitely kill us all, while 51 per cent of respondents are gullible idiots destined to die screaming as the human pudding sacks of these gigantic, horrifying arachnassassins.

Ten years of wielding a blunt instrument

John Birmingham has been writing this column for 10 years. Makes you think.

Bill Gates once said that people tend to overestimate what's possible in one year, and underestimate what's possible in 10. He was talking about technology, but think about your life 10 years ago and you'll probably agree that the super-nerd spoke the truth. I wrote my welcome column here at the Instrument 10 years ago today. I've filed just under a thousand times since then.

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